Monday, May 3, 2010


MAXMOM here...
A number of couples in our circle of friends have recently announced their intention of splitting up. Most of these friends have been in long-term relationships and for whatever reason have decided on venturing along their own paths towards greener pastures. This news always leaves us with an uneasy sense of sadness and regret.

In February this year my husband and I celebrated 27 years of marriage. As expected in long term relationships we too have had our own set of hiccups over the years, but we have remained together and shared our lives in a happy and fulfilling marriage.

The break-ups of our close friends leaves us rather disconcerted, even though we are not directly involved in their lives.  For us it feels like an earth tremor – not a “7” on the Richter Scale, but a mild “2” perhaps – as the stability of our extended support group is now brought into question.

Each time I hear of such a break-up, I make a point of going to my dear hubby and giving him a great big bear hug as well as a long speech about how much he means to me. I affectionately call him, “The Boss”, a term which makes fun of the fact that he is such an easy going and wonderful man. He is also a man of few words, but what I’ve discovered over the years of our marriage is that he can come up with the most profound (and wise) statements at the most unexpected moments.

Last night, on hearing about another breakup of two of our friends, I said to him...

“So why don’t YOU go and look for greener pastures?”

To which my dear hubby replied:

“Why do I need greener pastures when I have my very own cabbage patch?”


I have found this retort both endearing and very amusing. Amidst my enjoyment of his words, I have also asked myself,

“Cabbage Patch?!
What on earth does he mean by “Cabbage Patch?!”

Does he mean this...

Or does he mean this...

What possibly could my dear Man mean?
Any suggestions?

I'd be interested to know your response!


the magic sleigh said...

Cabbage patch? Who knows, it is a man.... I also have been married for almost 27 years.Times have not always been easy, but we have learned that trust, love, sacrifice and just being there for each other is the best thing for us.Yes sacrifice is one of the most important things, because if you truly love the other you will give up, or alter what you want to please your partner.
I too get scared when I see couples which break up, it is always difficult and I start to lose my faith, we struggle and finally get back on track.

I hope you forever remain his Cabbage patch!

-Kira The BeaWootiful's Mom

Ms. ~K said...

It doesn't get much greener than a cabbage I think that was the ultimate compliment!

BTW, Cabbage Patch Kids were originally created in my hometown, Cleveland, GA...I have one of the originals!
Hugs to all,

kks said...

love the new blog.....
when i think of cabbage patch, i think of allll funny and are strange and wonderful creatures, eh?! :)
glad Maxdog is doing well...

Sheila and Bob said...

We will be married 44 years June 4, and as others have said, sacrifice and sharing are a big part of many years of a happy marriage.
Every marriage and every family has problems, hardship sadness, it is how those are dealt with that encompasses a successful marriage

Back in about 200 B.C. the Romans had a saying;
"It is the cabbage that surpasses all other vegetables."
so you should be very happy that you are in that cabbage patch.

Hamish & Sophie's
Mom & Dad

KB said...

At least you know that "the boss" replied from his heart rather than repeating a common saying!

Andrea said...

The beauty in the green cabbage never fades...have you matter how long the cabbage sits in your refrigerator it retains its beauty. You, my dear have a beautifully green marriage!

I am honored to follow you, here. Know I am praying for you.

Hugs, andrea

Anya said...

I'm a new follower :)))
Nice to know its Autumn on your place !!!!
I did't know it !!!!!

Hugs for my woof woof friend Max from kareltje =^.^=

Jacqueline said...

I think he means it doesn't get any greener than a cabbage patch and he's aware it doesn't get any better than YOU!!...What a wise husband you have, Caryl!...Congratulations on your happy stable marriage, it is certainly something to be cherished...I was married 13 years, been divorced 9 years (it was tragic, like a death) and would love to be married again, but never want to go through another divorce, so I have been extra careful...I'm still hopeful though!...Kisses to your babies, blessings to Max.

Anonymous said...

I think he means Life could not get any greener than it is now. My husband and I will be celebrating our 32nd anniversary this July 7th.
I was 18 and he was 23 years old when we married.I think a lot of people didn't think it would work but we showed them. We too have had our ups and downs..but with Love you can overcome anything. I can not imagine life without him. I've been with him since I was 16. We have a 30yr old daughter,5cats and 2stray cats. Its a good life.

Angel Ginger Jasper said...

He means he is comfortable and happy in his own back yard and does not need to go for pastures that may look greener.. He is Happy.. HUgs GJ and Carol x

Angel Junior, Orion and Sammy said...

We don't much about cabbage or pastures, but we are thinking he is purrty happy where he is.

Sierra Rose said...

Hi Maxmom! Very nice site, we are glad to find you.
Twenty seven years is wonderful! Dave and I are going on year TWO!! The green cabbage patch comment makes us smile big! The turns life takes always make us pause and wonder...

Hugs from us!

The Life of Riley said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
The Life of Riley said...

There is an old saying: “The grass always looks greener on the other side of the fence, until you get there and find it is artificial turf” I’m glad “the boss” is wise enough to know that he's already on the best side, without having to check out what is over the fence.

Twenty-seven years is a wonderful achievement, and I’m wishing you both at least 27 more happy years together in the cabbage patch while you try to figure out what he meant about cabbages :)

Scout and Freyja said...

Quite frankly, being Polish, I'll take the cabbages that I can cook! YUM!

sprinkles said...

Congrats on 27 years of togetherness! That's really something to be quite proud of. Sadly, lots of marriages don't even make it to the 5 year mark.

houndstooth said...

Perhaps he means you're greener and leafier than grass! ;) Aren't you supposed to find treasures hidden under cabbages, too?

Valerie Cummings said...

OH LOL!!!!! Cabbage Patch??? Thats sweet! Its always nice to hear of a long time love.....And what beautiful photos you have here!!!! Hugs Joey and Kealani, and Valerie

Dexter said...

Hey MaxMom! We made it! One big virtual hop to the new bloggy.


kissa-bull said...

yay we made it too!!! cant wait for more of your great posts.

Tweedles -- that's me said...

I think the boss means that he
"has it all" and if you were a cabbage- maybe you would win a ribbon at the fair.

Deborah said...

Hi there, I think that means that your husband thinks your a real "doll". That is a very good thing. I am going on 24 yrs of marriage and we are in a very rough period, sad but true, he screwed up and the trust is lost. Not once, but twice. So I would consider yourself very lucky to still be the "doll" in your husbands eyes!
I can't get on the comments from your most recent post but only you know what to do, I wouldn't even go there. I have had to put only a couple of pets down and that is when they couldn't even get up and move and I knew they were tired, very tired. It is a very personal decision and only you and your family will know when the right time is if there ever is a right time.